Softer Hours

One day I felt like the world was being too much. More precisely, my mind was being too much. I was stressed because of school, because of all of the new things, myself, I have also been worrying over the social issues that are going on in the world all the time, the climate emergency, everything. So, it is quite natural that one day it would all feel like too much. In that moment of despair, I realized that I cannot make a positive change in any way in this fascinating, beautiful world if I do not take care of my own well-being first. 

Hence, the cake. It was a grand piece of vegan peanut butter and chocolate cake. With Earl Grey. For one day, I did everything I wanted. I skipped my classes for the day, stared out of the window, stared at the people walking down the road... Slowly, my anxiety got lifted, and I found the joy in small things again.

To be honest, it feels a little weird writing this. It feels like it is trivial things; everybody is anxious about school, the future, the world, the environment, everybody’s got their pressures. And I do not want to sound like I’m complaining. After all, we are the fortunate ones.

However, I know this; every time someone else confesses they feel anxious about this or that, I have compassion for them. I am here for them. It also comforts me, because it means that I am not alone. It is so natural to feel overwhelmed in our busy and connected world, and it definitely seems like there are fewer people living with no anxiety at all. How else could we explain the global problems with mental health, addictions, and alienation? 

And, as we know, social media can be used for many things. It is a tool through which we can spread understanding, kindness, and information. So, I wanted to confess that I have been feeling anxious, sad, and guilty, even in the midst of being extremely happy and grateful for simply living my life. We had a lengthy conversation with my roommate today, and we came into the conclusion that the world needs more communication, more opening-up, more transparency. If this way I can make someone feel they are not alone, I’m happy. If someone thinks I’m talking about weird things, well, let’s just say life is a little too short for caring about anything like that.

So, if you are having a hard time, just know that it is going to be alright. And do not forget to take time for yourself as often as possible, doing the things that you love, opening up to the people around you. (Reminding myself, too, here...) 

It costs nothing to be as soft and kind to yourself as you are to others. 

♡ Laura